Is There Such a Thing as Ethical Cheating?

If you have ever been cheated on in a relationship you know full well how much that can hurt. If you were the one that cheated and got caught, you likely saw first-hand the pain that you caused your partner.

Ethical Cheating

While there are some cultures in the world which view having multiple partners while being involved in a stable relationship as something which is normal, most western societies do not. Of course, no culture and no society is uniform. There are going to be behavioral areas where there is nuance, where there are shades of grey — even if they must reside in the shadows. In the case of having multiple partners, there are some couples that openly embrace the idea. These polygamous relationships differ from the so-called “ethical cheating arrangement” in that both partners in the relationship participate in tandem with another individual. Ethical cheaters, however, do not do this.

— What Then Is Ethical Cheating? —

Ethical cheating involves one or both partners in a relationship engaging in a physical relationship with another person with the knowledge — but non-participation — of their main partner. This, therefore, excludes polygamous couples, swingers, and classical adultery.

— Why Become Involved With Ethical Cheating? —

There are many reasons why couples may become involved with ethical cheating. Some may enter it because they entered into a marriage out of convenience — monetary or professional —and physical attraction between both partners simply does not exist. Those types of relationships will require an ethical cheating arrangement to be in place in order for the two people involved to be able to vent to their sexual needs.

For other couples, the spark of their initial sexual passion may have faded away. They may still have strong emotional and loving feelings for each other but their sexual excitement needs to be sown elsewhere.

You also have the situation where one of the partners in the relationship can no longer perform sexually. This may be brought about by age, a medical condition, or an injury. Under those circumstances, the impotent partner may give their consent for the other to seek their physical fulfillment with someone else.

There are also circumstances in which one of the partners harbors a specific sexual fetish which the other partner finds objectionable. Their objection is not in the sense that they find it distasteful in a broad sense, rather they just cannot bring themselves to fulfill their partner’s desire for them to participate in it. Under those circumstances, some partners are willing to give license to the other to seek their specific sexual fetish with someone else.

— The Moral Imperative for Ethical Cheating —

Using the terms “moral imperative” and “cheating” in the same sentence might seem oxymoronic to some. However, in order for there to be ethical cheating, there is a prerequisite for a moral imperative. That being that both partners must be aware that it is taking place and they must consent to it. Additionally, the sexual activity that takes place outside of the relationship must be segregated from everything else that binds the relationship together. In other words, the cheating must never become a source of conflict, emotional pain, or jealousy.

— Online Dating Platforms Suitable for Ethical Cheating —

In order for ethical cheating to take place, it is essential that when the time comes to meet the third party that is going to be involved, that it takes place in a setting that is conducive to that type of relationship. In other words, you must make certain that the third person is aware of what their status in your life is going to be. They must be accepting of the fact that there will be no room for emotional or sentimental attachment. That the relationship is strictly sexual in nature and that it will never go beyond the physical realm.

While that may sound simple enough, it can be a tall order. All men and women are emotional creatures to some degree. Unless they are searching for the same physical-only type of relationship as you are, some may have a difficult time keeping sentimental attachment out of it.

This is why one of the best places to find partners for ethical cheating is on online dating platforms. We are not referring to the average general audience dating site. We are referring to a select group of sites that either cater directly or consequently to ethical cheaters.

1. AdultFriendFinder

Cheatnig Sites - Adultfriendfinder

AdultFriendFinder, due to its size and longevity, is an excellent source to find partners for ethical cheating. Although the site is not designed specifically for that niche, it is welcoming and understanding of it.

Also, the numerous forums that are found on AdultFriendFinder are an excellent source for ethical cheaters to find like-minded individuals discussing the topic. That can set you off in the right direction for finding other ethical cheaters on the platform with whom to hook up.

2. Ashley Madison

Cheatnig Sites - ashley-madison

Although in recent years Ashley Madison has taken on a more sedate facade, it is still a hookup site that is devoted to cheating. Yes, Ashley Madison tends to focus more on cheating in the general sense — as in sneaking behind your partner’s back — but since the members of Ashley Madison are primarily only interested in discreet sexual encounters and have no ambitions for a sentimental attachment anyway, the site can be a great resource for finding partners if you are an ethical cheater.

3. ALT

Cheatnig Sites - ALT

ALT is owned and operated by the same company that operates AdultFriendFinder. As such, you can rely on it to have the same level of service, powerful search capability, and large community as AFF. However, since ALT focuses strictly on sexual fetishes, BDSM, and other kinks, it is an excellent platform when you want to meet someone solely to satisfy a particular sexual desire.

The majority of the members of ALT are there purely for sexual reasons as well. Even though it is not designed to be a site solely for ethical cheaters, a considerable number are present. Especially those who are involved in ethical cheating strictly to fulfill a specific sexual kink.


Cheatnig Sites - openminded

We’ll include this site because it is the quintessential site for ethical cheating. As a matter of fact, they identify themselves as such. This means that all aspects of the site, from its design, user interface, communication features, privacy policies, and membership base — they are all geared toward that end.

You do not have to worry about having to explain yourself to others regarding what you are looking for when you meet somebody on the Openminded platform. Everybody who is a member is there for the same purpose that you are. This can greatly alleviate the stress and tension of having to bring your intentions to the open.

— The Takeaway —

If your relationship situation is sound you are probably not in a position that requires you to think about any aspect of the topic of ethical cheating. However, if you are in any of the situations that we described at the top of this article, you should not feel ashamed about participating in ethical cheating.

While cheating in the classical sense can be easily judged as being wrong due to the disloyalty and unfaithfulness that is involved, ethical cheating cannot be examined under the same lens. After all, it is an understanding between both parties in a relationship. Since both have to accept it there is no deception — there is no pain being inflicted. As such, if you are an ethical cheater don’t let society smear you. Don’t feel that you must repress it.