It happened again. One of those headache gremlins must have bitten your lady last night. After all, what else could explain that she has had a headache for nearly 40 nights in a row? Perhaps it’s all that fluorescent lighting where she works? No, it can’t be — they switched to LED last year — so it must be the gremlins.
Before we go any further, get a glass of water and a couple of aspirin. No, it’s not for your lady — it’s for you. You see, all of those headaches that she’s been having — they aren’t all on the up and up. Most were probably just an excuse to — not have sex. (Go ahead, take those aspirin before reading on.)
As astonishing as that may sound, it is highly likely that your lady just did not want to have carnal knowledge of you these past few nights. Hard to believe, right? After all, it has been proven scientifically (well, at least in your own head) that you are a prime, finely tuned sexual machine. What woman in her right mind would ever pass up on you?
All kidding aside, though. There are many reasons why women avoid sex. Here are 8 possible reasons she had a “headache” again last night.
1. Her Needs Are Not Being Met
It is not uncommon for a woman to feign not feeling well to avoid intimacy when her sexual needs are not being satisfied. Usually, she does this to avoid the awkwardness of having to fake sexual satisfaction.
Unfortunately, under such circumstances, it could become a prelude to splitsville. Not because of the lack of sex, but rather for the lack of communication. It is fundamental for a woman to be able to communicate to her partner how well, or how poorly, he is satisfying her.
A man should not take offense if the woman in his life informs him of his shortcomings. (no pun intended)
Remember, if she tells you she wants something done differently, she is not doing so to criticize your manhood. Rather, she’s displaying immense trust in you — and you should comply.
2. You Are Too Emotionally Needy in Bed
Imagine what it would be like having sex with a person that is in constant need of positive reinforcement. Imagine a person that is so sexually insecure, that they hound their partner throughout the act with questions such as, “does that feel good? how about there? are you sure you like it?”
Don’t hound her with constant requests for evaluations on your performance — it’s sex, man. You’re not an Uber driver vying for a five-star rating.
As the first item on this list made clear, listen to what she has to say, but don’t pester her with questions about your prowess while you’re doing it.
3. She’s Bored
Occasionally, women avoid sex because they are bored with the routine nature of their sex life. If it’s always the same positions, or the same time of night, the same place — can you blame her?
The solution to this is to mix things up every now and then. Take her to a fancy hotel. Buy her some sexy lingerie. Be spontaneous about it — like when you first started dating. Be “handsy” with her in unexpected places, such as the kitchen, in the car, etc. Make her feel desired throughout the day. Send her a naughty text out of the blue in the middle of the afternoon. Get her out of her sexual rut. Need some inspiration? Check out our post on “14 Bold Places to Have Sex”
4. There Is Such a Thing as Too Much Endurance
Okay, this one is for you super studs out there. You know who you are — those of you that take pride in lasting all night long. Well, allow us to fill you in on a little secret — there is such a thing as having too much endurance.
While no woman wants a “three-taps and your out” performance from their man, the polar opposite — a marathon man — is no fun either. If she knows that each time you have sex it will involve a prolonged and physically exhaustive session — well, she might think twice about it. Especially is she’s tired and has a long day ahead of her in the morning.
Don’t use this as an excuse to become a “sprinter,” but do place each sexual opportunity in context. Have a diverse repertoire. Be conscious that sometimes sex must take place at a more leisurely pace. This will also help to make those intense and prolonged sessions (that we all know you are capable of) much more special. In sex, as with everything in life, there is a time and place for everything.
5. She’s Too Technical
This is a new one, but for the age we live in it should not be surprising. A study in 2015 indicated that 70 percent of women in monogamous relationships reported that they have put off sex more than once with their partners due to their smartphones.
This doesn’t necessarily mean that she prefers updating her social media to doing the sweaty bed dance with you. It’s just indicative that sometimes we all can fall to the addictive allure of our phones and 24/7 connectivity.
This is an increasing issue for many couples. So much so, that there are even “turn off to turn on” movements to promote the idea that couples should set some time to be free of their tech gadgets in order to allow their sexual vibe an opportunity “to engage.”
6. Not Enough Time for Herself
A study from the University of Texas at Austin and another from the University of Aberdeen demonstrated how women that are bogged down by work stress, daily chores or who live sedentary lifestyles are over 30 percent more prone to experience lowered sexual libidos.
You know what that means — it’s time to help your lady get some time for herself. Whether she spends it exercising, reading or just relaxing — the more “me” time she has, the more “fun time” you will have together later on.
7. There’s Someone Else
It’s difficult to imagine, but it does happen. If her sexual interest in you suddenly wanes, there is always the possibility that she is seeing another person. You should never jump to conclusions, but sexual inactivity with a partner is one of the recognized signs of infidelity.
8. Sexual Gremlins
Actually, there are no such things as sexual gremlins, but we didn’t want to end on the infidelity thing.
— Curing the “Headache” —
As you can deduce from the list, many of the causes of these mysterious “headaches” can easily be remedied. Provided, of course, that you prescribe the proper “dose of medicine.”