12 Telltale Signs Your Partner is Cheating
Infidelity is the gravest transgression that can exist in any relationship. This is so because it involves more than just the act of being unfaithful. It also involves lying to cover it up — it puts in question the sincerity of the feelings and emotions that normally hold a relationship together. Even if it was a passing fling that the other partner regrets, cheating erodes and destroys the trust in the relationship.
This is why knowing how to identify the telltale signs of a cheating partner is so important. You don’t want your inner fears and jealousies to falsely accuse your partner of a situation that doesn’t exist, but you also don’t want to be the naive partner that is blind to the cheating ways of your significant other. Knowing — as painful as it may be — is better than not knowing.
12 Signs Your Partner May be Cheating
1. Suddenly Starts Storing Phone Numbers With Initials Rather Than Full Names
If you suddenly start noticing new phone numbers appearing in your partner’s contact list. If they are saved with initials or vague terms like “office1, pizza2” chances are that these numbers are not meant for public disclosure. If you dial one of those numbers at an odd hour from their phone and you get a voice answering on the other end in a knowing and familiar fashion — chances are that something is not right.
2. Guilt Mitigation
Cheating, regardless of how cold hearted the other person may be, will always produce guilt as a byproduct. If you suddenly start receiving gifts or compliments out of the blue when such behavior is out of the norm for your partner — that could be a result of the guilt they are feeling for cheating on you.
3. Extreme Nervousness or Extreme Giddiness
Changes in personality and demeanor can also be a sign of infidelity. Your partner suddenly starts acting very nervous. He or she questions the motive behind even the most benign of questions that you pose. Your partner becomes defensive for no apparent reason — these could all be signs that they have something to hide.
Some people act giddy when nervous. If your partner suddenly seems absent-minded, tries to laugh off questions or simply tries to introduce a dash of silliness whenever the topic of cheating comes up — that could be a sign as well.
Nervousness and giddiness are stronger signs when they appear out of the blue and are traits entirely out of character for your partner.
4. Say What?
Let’s face it, after you’ve been around someone for any length of time you become accustomed to their expressions, sayings — even the way that they use profanity. The both of you even start absorbing and using each others’ phrases and expressions.
If your partner starts using expressions with greater regularity than they used before, it could be a sign that they are being verbally influenced by another person that you know nothing about.
5. Excuses to Spurn the Ring
If you are married and your spouse stops wearing their wedding ring, this is an obvious sign. Be wary, most will be cautious about not wearing their ring. They will take it off when they leave the house. So, if you catch your spouse without their ring when they first come home, but then it’s back on during dinner — there is grounds for serious suspicion.
6. Evidence of Pay to Play
Cheating is a pay to play sport. No matter how low-key the affair, there will be expenses. These could be Uber rides, credit card receipts, cash receipts, etc. As the saying goes, “follow the money.” If you find receipts to restaurants that you’ve never visited as a couple, receipts for flowers or gifts that never came your way — or worse, hotel charges on a credit card statement — a cheating heart may be at play.
7. Cleanliness is Next to a Conniving Cheating Heart
We’ll take it as a given that your partner has excellent personal hygiene habits, but what about when those same hygiene habits become suspicious. You know, taking a shower the moment they arrive. Becoming obsessive about washing their clothes the moment they took them off, etc. These are normally not a sign of hygiene becoming an obsession, rather they are signs of your partner wanting to destroy the evidence of their cheating.
8. No Longer Takes Initiative in the Romance Department
While this remains one of the most cited signs of cheating, be wary about reading too much into it at first. Many times a lowered libido is caused by other factors — stress, health issues, other relationship problems, etc. However, if your partner abruptly stops seeking you out for intimacy and one of the other signs are present — then it could be seen as an affirmation of their cheating.
9. Becomes a Cybersecurity Evangelist
If your partner is one of those people that never took tech security too seriously. If their passwords were commonly “PASSWORD.” If the access code to their smartphone was your birthday, but suddenly they start changing their passwords to 60-character alphanumeric strings that not even Russia’s best hackers could crack, then there is room for suspicion.
If it’s related to work — or as a reaction to a recent security breach — they should share their new passwords with you again almost as soon as they changed them. If, however, they keep you out of the loop — well…
10. Smartphone Becomes Their Siamese Twin
The low-tech variation of the previous sign is when your partner starts latching on to their smartphone 24/7. If in the past they routinely left their phone on the kitchen counter, by the bed or on the coffee table — but now they take it with them everywhere, even in the bathroom — that’s a strong sign of potential infidelity.
11. Sudden Changes in Taste
Normally, couples grow and expand their tastes and experiences together. They discover new restaurants, new types of cuisines, TV programs and the like — together — as a couple. If your partner begins to display new tastes, new preferences out of the blue. If out of nowhere they are suddenly wine experts, or have new topics of conversation that you never heard of before — chance are that they are spending “quality” time with another person and it is that person’s influence that you are witnessing.
12. Looks Matter, Again
No matter how obsessive we may be about our appearance, when we are in a solid relationship we begin to take things for granted. This doesn’t mean that we become slobs or sedentary lumps, but we do take a few shortcuts compared to when we were single. If your partner suddenly starts working out more than usual; actively and successfully starts dieting; purchases trendier clothes and starts experimenting with new hair styles — yep, you guessed it — they could be cheating.
Hopefully, you will never have to go through the heartache and disappointment of a cheating partner. However, if it is happening, the sooner you know, the sooner you can do something about it. Whether that is confronting your partner (in a civilized manner, of course), leaving them, or seeking relationship counseling — knowing is always the first step.
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